Sunday, March 15, 2009

You know you're a good mom when....

Your son feels so securely attached that he easily makes meaningful connections with other loving adults in his life.

He transitions easily to a new school, and impresses everyone when he elects
himself to be the one who helps another new student adjust by being his special buddy, and helping him when he felt shy or sad.

You decided to stop yelling a week ago, and haven't yelled since.

You give your son a selection of pictures to take to school for the "family" wall, and he looks through them, and chooses one of everyone he adores, and also picks a picture of his birth mother, because she carried me in her tummy to you.

You made pork chops for the first time, and they were good.

You let your four year old take a picture of you with your nice camera, and it comes out well.

Your 18 month old, has so many words and ways to express himself, that you actually understand more then don't what he needs.

Friends rent houses 5 minutes away, to be close to your family.

You have successfully navigated over the past year and some, a co-parenting relationship with your older brother who moved back to the states, your state even, in big part to be nearer to your children.

You have bought him a booster seat for his car, because it is time, and he is fine with that.

You order huge appliques of sports figures to put on the wall of the playroom, and include a few girls too, so that all our friends want to come play.

You practice the karate bow, so your son can get his first belt tomorrow.

You make time to do the stair master at least 15 minutes a day, so you can continue to not yell.

You remember not to wash his hair because the ruptured ear drum could get infected if the soap gets in there.

You kept your son pain free with tylenol and motrin safely.

You inform the doctor at the Saturday office location (who actually has her practice there and isn't just filling in) that this is the third and hopefully last time you need to call to someones attention the fact that the six giant 18x24 color photographs of all white children in the lobby do not take into consideration the needs of all of her patients.

You thank her as she agrees. And, so does your son.

You recorded a happy birthday video for their grandfather, and sent it on time, because the kids wanted to show them how they do yoga.

Your kids do yoga, even though you don't know how to.

The book they often request to read is the book you made on Shutterfly about their summer vacation in Washington--because they like to "read about themselves".

For all the self aware hyper critical introspection you do, you are able to praise yourself for your excellent parenting when it is time.

1 comment:

SSmithstein said...

okay I really really love this list and can think of about 100 more things (at least) that are evidence of how incredible of a mother you are.

not only that, but the amazing verbatim interview you recorded with sam and used to think you should be a better parent? this is really what stood out to me:

4. What was I like as a child? You were like me.
8. What do I do when you're not around? That's crazy.
9. If I were to become famous, what will it be for? Writing a book or a poem.
10. What am I really good at? Making things happen for us.
12. What do I do for my job? Help people be nice, make good choices and learn to write and read
14. What makes you proud of me? When you read your poems in front of people with a microphone
16. What do you and I do together? Special things without my brother.
17. How are you and I the same? We play basketball.
18. How are you and I different? Our skin.
19. How do you know I love you? I am in your heart.
20. Where is my favorite place to go? Do you go anywhere?

these answers are of a child who feels completely loved, who feels like he both sees his amazing mother AND (appropriately for his age) can't imagine that she has a life besides of him!

I long to evidence your great parenting up close one of these days, my friend...

love the list, keep on making them!